i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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