Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
only you would photoshop your dick
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
