All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
