this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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