I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Randomize
