glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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