Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
