fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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