yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
