I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
