just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
