if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
