Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
a search helicopter?!
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
