I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
why is half of my head shaved?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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