Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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