Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
