we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize