Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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