A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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