we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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