What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
