if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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