The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
