When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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