How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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