I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
