I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
