You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
