I heard we made out
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
