Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
