I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
