I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize