After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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