I must be too annoying 4 u.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Randomize
