smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize