Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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