Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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