You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize
