Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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