the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize