Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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