his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
