The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
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