I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
