I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
