i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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