Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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