It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
