Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
