I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Send help, water and tortillas.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize